I think it’s fair to say that most feminists have pretty strong opinions when it comes to the subject of weddings.
There are many bad things to be said about wedding culture: starting with heterosexism, moving onto bridezilla and other negative stereotypes, pit-stopping at all the traditions historically rooted in misogyny, and ending with the consumerism of it all. I used to have my tent firmly pitched in the “never getting married” camp, but I’ve been rethinking that lately.
I’ve recently attended some fantastic weddings- my good friend’s and my sister’s- that just really warmed my heart. One of my best friends recently got engaged, and when he told me, my heart was filled to the brim with happiness! I searched around to see if I was feeling even a little cynical, but I wasn’t! Not at all! I don’t know how this transition happened, but I’ve recently realized I’m a wedding lover.
In general, I’m not a fan of tradition, big ceremony, or grand romantic gestures. Doesn’t it seem like a wedding is all three of these? Well, not if wedding is simply defined as “celebration of commitment” ? I tend to get some slack from feminist friends when I admit to liking weddings. I use feminism as an analogy: just because feminism means angry, hairy, man-hater to some, doesn’t mean I still don’t identify and claim the word with my own meaning, and just because wedding means big, white, give-the-bride-away to some, doesn’t mean I don’t still want one with my own meaning!
I’m totally single right now, so I’m definitely not planning a wedding. But I do subscribe to a whole bunch of wedding blogs. I subscribe to home renovation blogs even though I rent a place that doesn’t allow me to paint, too. (If you’re interested, two of my favourites are Offbeat Bride and Style Me Pretty). I will also now publicly admit that I watched last night’s episode (in which Jim and Pam got married) of The Office twice. In a row. It was a great episode!
I guess this post is just to say that we like what we like, and let’s not revoke people’s feminist card about it.